Reboot system drive

I have been super sick the past 5 days. Actually started to feel it in my flanks a few weeks ago, which I am use since my channelopathy meds kinda do that with me. But then came the throat. And spiritually I have been down myself. The combo of it all has literally wiped my body's hard drive and and I am doing a complete system reboot. 

Sometimes getting super sick is just that. Your body saying NO MORE, time to reorganize and come out stronger. I know for myself, when I get sick, I get super sick. Sersly I barely have the energy to type this up. I so know in the end I will come out stronger. 

Spiritually I have been a mess. My home life currently has a lot of stress especially in the money side of the house of things. Honestly I am at my breaking point. I have been meditating and doing things I need to do, but not enough. I am not taking the mental breaks. I am not doing me. I am not doing self care. Basically I am not taking care of my own hard drive. 

Why am I using the references of a computer? Well your body is just that one giant computer. Your brain being the hard drive. You have to maintain it. Or it is system failure. Currently I have been in system failure and system upgrade mode. I know this cause I feel like I am changing inside. Things are becoming more clear to me and I am moving pass all the bullshite of life. I am also getting stronger as a lightworker. So I am growing on that path. I am going beyond on all the messes and all of darkness. I am becoming more pushy, yes, I said that. I am in this phase of hey, you got help yourself. You got to do get out of your head and do something. I may come off a little brass for people, but I also know that spirit moves thru me and pushes helps me push people where they need to be pushed towards. 

I am not afraid, but I am afraid. I am more afraid of my own future, cause of where money lies with my family right now, but I am not afraid of who I am. I am my authentic self, and I am ok with that. I know people are going to love me for whom I am no matter what. If they don't, then they never truly loved me in the beginning. That is what you learn on this journey in life. 

This blog is title confessions of a lightworker. I bring you tools to help you, my "guru" side of me (how I hate that term guru, but we will use that term for term sake). But I also bring you hey, I am human side of me. My shortcomings. my struggles. Does this make me a bad "guru"? No, this does not. I live in a reality world. I am enlightened. Very much so, I do live in a "be here now" - I think showing my shortcomings makes me a better lightworker. To quote Ram Dass “It is important to expect nothing, to take every experience, including the negative ones, as merely steps on the path, and to proceed.”