Yes, I just posted a photo of "don't be a dick". These are simple words, that yes are hard (not on the positivity side of the house), but those simple words got your attention right?
Yes, we live in a society that is all about LOOK AT ME culture, we have YT, SNAPCHAT, INSTA, FACEBOOK and so many other SOCIAL MEDIA outlets. But does it give a person a right to 'be a dick", or even the right to not expand our minds so far that we have forgotten who WE REALLY ARE? Yes, this is another lesson about authentic life.
We live in a society that is more about sharing negativity that really sharing positivity. DAILY even positive people I know, share the negative. It gets covered up with "well it's about being socially aware", which I am all about social awareness, but why as a society do we focus on the "dick moves" of the world. Why can't we focus, on the positive out of the negativity and give that more a universal signal boost? Do we use it as a coping tool to hide our own non authentic life? What are we truly masking?
I have had my share of negative things going on in my life, but with all of that I always try to see the good out of the negative. Is it hard? Why of course. When things stir off course, my world crumbles around me, remember I am only human on this planet earth. I don't have a magic spell that will make everything better. But I do have my own thoughts, and my own intentions where I can stir the course to a better solution. Now that is truly magical when all the combos are just right. Authentic life, is about all the lessons, you learn while making that magic happen. Authentic life is about all the right ingredients inside your soul and recognizing them and embracing them.
Authentic life is also about embracing. You embrace the bad and the good. You see the good in every situation, even in the bad times.
I will give you an example of embracing my own part of my life. Are you ready?
This past June we was rendered homeless, due to my ex landlord selling the house we lived in. We was given 20 DAYS to leave a home that we strived for over a year to keep, due to all the hardships of moving to a new location and starting over literally from scratch. My husband at the time was working 6 days a week, 2 jobs. He could not help me pack. My soul sister whom lives here in Washington as well, also had started a new job ( I was watching her daughter for her). So here it was not only effecting our life, but also my soul sister's life. Now at the time, I cried many tears. I was also very angry. I somehow made it through the 20 days, packing. We had another friend that was kind and left their van for us to use to move things. A few times they was able to come and move stuff in storage. WE did it with the combined effort of my close circle around me. The impossible task was conquered.
Next, we moved our couple suitcases, my service dog, tea cart and pillows into a secondary room my soul sister has. That is where my husband and I have been living since the end of June. July rolled around, and it was like shell shock. My husband, ended quitting one of his jobs to primary focus on the out of town job that paid more money and more hours (he was only part time at his old job and with new management very few hours). My husband on average commutes a total of 3-4 extra hours depending on traffic daily. Don't sound to bad, but my husband also is a driver for his work, so on the road an average of 9 hours daily, so in reality my husband spends 13-14 hours daily driving. He is tired. But this is the life we choose to do, and even with all of that driving- MY HUSBAND IS THE HAPPIEST he has ever been in years working. CRAZY RIGHT? No, that is embracing authentic life. Even as July rolled in, my soul sister's work schedule got crazy. I was able to be there for my soul daughter without her having the worry. So I embraced this was where I am suppose to be at this moment.
August/September rolls in and my hubby and I start seeking online for possible new places. Scary part was in the area he works in the places was just not in our budget. Ok, next...I just kept pushing forward. We even went to a place was was told NO, because before we could fill out the application, my husband simply did not make enough money, according to their standards and renting regulations. I felt so defeated that day. I just could not even look at the mountain without crying. My symbol of strength was completely WTF what's next? So I bucked up and kept searching. We applied for an income based apartment, we was yes, finally a break. Well, 2 days later we was denied, due to credit. Once again I felt defeated. How can my life be based on numbers on a piece of paper. What has society become, when we stopped looking at the person inside and we just all have become a credit score. That lead me to much more thinking.
When my brain thinks, it loves to remind me who I am. See, being homeless "but not homeless" according to society, I had more learning to do. During this trail in my life, I have learned why homelessness is an issue in America. I learned new information, that I am suppose to do share, and let there be that "social awareness", where normally people turn a blind eye. I also know all my positives in my life. Yes, I do have a roof over my head which I am utter grateful for. Not only am I safe but my family is as well. I also learned from all this experience, some inner child mantra work I really need to work on. See all of this has really uprooted my lotus flower inside myself. I feel lost, no place to land calling it my own. I feel this is a nail in a coffin for some issues and work I have been doing these past 2 years, starting over. As I write these words in the blog, you only see a fraction of the real me, my authentic self I am showing you now. The scared one, who doesn't know where she will be in the next few months. But is writing this blog in hopes of teaching. Why I even bother to write at all is to only teach, pass whatever knowledge in my life I am suppose to do. Be the bridge at this moment. My authentic life is to let you know no matter "who is being a dick" "that shitty stuff that happens" that look at all the beautiful lessons that life is teaching you, showing you and for love of it all what positives you can see and pass along.
My parting words are simple: DON'T BE A DICK to yourself. Allow yourself to focus on the good things, train your mind. Pass your knowledge to others and teach other's "NOT TO BE A DICK" Most important don't feed the negativity, your soul will thank you.
I am chuckling about my choice of title for this week blog post. I kinda do feel very Leeloo at times and in a way the type of starseed For pop culture sake I am a bit like a Leeloo, no wonder why my husband loves that movie so much and I do as well. LOL The clicks in my head, but then again that is what this entire week has been about.
One of the main questions I get asked a lot is where do I get the knowledge I know. Did I learn it somewhere. What books did I read, etc. Most will be surprised, I don't read a lot of "new age" books. I have books. I use books for references. I know authors, but when I read them, the read is more of a validation of knowledge I have known all my life. It sounds kinda of cocky I know. But as a star seed our brains are wired very interesting. But to answer that question honestly, I get the information and my knowledge from source. It's already in my brain, it just get's accessed when I need to use it. Kinda like a computer accessing files.
Before my ataxia took over my body I was a multitasker like crazy. My thirst for knowledge was the same way. Well, it still is I am just a bit slower now, but the material I like to study are kinda wacky and random. I mean who takes a MIT to understand molecular biology and convert DNA sequence to RNA sequence to protein sequence by the great professor Eric S. Lander Take his Introduction to Biology- The Secret of Life if you want to challenge yourself. You will be folding proteins fun stuff! Okay slightly off topic but not really. But this is how my brain has always worked. I have more manuals and educational type books in my home than I have normal reading books. Kinda a star seed trait.
When I was a kid my books was George Orwell, Isaac Asimov, Ray Bradbury, with a mix of Nancy Drew. I loved them, because I was eager to solve them. I also was a lover of classics Lewis Carroll and Poe. As an adult I own books about Ram Dass, Buddhist teachings and more. But I only peer into them, when seeking help to get my point across or in need of inspiration.
I have been peeling away many layers of my star seed self. I knew I was a star seed as a child, because I never felt like I belong. I would hear stories from my father how my mother thought she was an alien herself. My father thinking she was bat shit crazy, so of course I kept my own feelings of feeling "alien" myself.
I saw arch angel Micheal as a child, he saved me more than once. I knew just growing up that things were not right. I did not have the kindest upbringing in my life. But I somehow managed to survive. I remember trying to run away one time when I was about 8th grade. I snuck out my window in the middle of the night, I just looked at the stars. I did not know where I was going to go, but it was freedom for a brief moment. And it was like the stars guided me back home, telling me, nope- you have to go back no matter. The sky and nature have always guided me. Just one of those other traits.
As I got older my I knew my dreams of becoming an astronaut was not going to be real, but I did join the service as a secret squirrel for a little while. I think that is when my own activation started. I started noticing people, and objects, and was in touch with my past lives. Basically in my 20s I kinda went coco puff crazy. I was vibing with the wrong and right people. Was pulled in way to many directions and had a few crash a burns. I would say more crashes than anything else. It happens. I was completely ungrounded. Also I was unaware of how old I was.
So we fast forward to my 40s. I turn 45 in January. And in the past 5 years I have been more in touch with my ancients than I have ever in my life. I have been able to transform the rest of my DNA that I need at this present time. I feel I am about 90% activated, and will never be at 100% because well that is pure source light. But in human form I will take the 90%. The funny thing about this all is I have had to go thru what I call the test by fire. Almost a test if I am worthy of being the key. And the past 5 years have been some very trying times in my life. I have love, lost, grieved, still grieving, joy, gratitude and many blessings. Yes, I am out weighting the negative, I am tipping my scales. That is what you have to do in life, tip your scales.
I had to figure out I am my own Fifth Element. I am the weapon that can fight off the evil that surrounds myself and other's around me. HEHE back to that Hamsa again. I am that divine light human form. I may not be fighting off a alien race to stop the great evil, I mean after all that is just a movie. But as a star seed I can tell you this, even thou that was just a movie, everyone has light within them, to stop hate. To promote peace, love and understanding. Our world needs that more now than ever. So take charge of your inner Leeloo and find your divine light. Become your own Fifth Element.
confessions of a starseed
Wisdom to be passed to the human race...