Well, it has been some busy months since I last posted. I started a new job within my community. I had shoulder surgery last month, along with moving and currently getting ready to host an exchange student for the school year. WE are beyond excited for these next chapters in our life. Everything I feel we have been manifesting is now here. It has been a long road, a difficult one as well, but we finally are on that road.
We (husband and I) had to let go of alot of things from our past, when we moved from Washington alot of personal things and material things were left behind, some by choice, some by forgetfulness of being sick and mentally drained and exhausted. Everyone in my family was sick, when we, left Washington state, my husband's blood pressure was in the above 240, we all lost so much weight it was literally making us ill. Mentally, I lost myself to the point I checked myself into a critical care unit. I have a full blown nervious breakdown, where my body, just gave up. It broke down. We was not living our best life. We was more concerned about everyone else's needs, we forgotten about our own needs. So our own egos, had to let go of that behavior. It was time to take care of one self.
I have done mini workshops here about on self care, yet as a teacher I was not using my own practices. So yes, it was time to recenter and CHANGE.
We all have the road that life throws in front of us, I once stated this many times before, that road might be a smooth one or it might be one hell of a ride with lots of detours and contruction, however the road leads you to where you will go in the end. The part as a human being is to remember to keep your intentions and thought patterns on the positive part of that end result. Not to get stuck in the negative. If you do get stuck in the negative traffic of your life journey, remember that it is only temporary. Pray, say your affirmations or do what works for you to reset your mind. Your mind, is a computer. There are times, that computer needs a little cleaning up and a reboot. Don't be afraid. Trust me, there is some wonderful parts in that scary journey that are total lessons and when you get past that part of the journey and look back- you will understand how blessed you actually are.
Change and letting go you will lose things along the way, but remind yourself, that the things you lost have served their purpose in your life. As much as it may hurt when you look upon the things you have lost, remember the good in all of it. Don't get stuck. Don't feed the hurt it serves no purpose to you only hurt. Don't punish yourself. Especially for things that are beyond your control. I have always believed that God places things in our life because that is part our story in our book of life, I don't know why I feel like this book as been written with strange story lines so others can learn and grow or within ourselves we have a destiny greater than we can imagine after we are long gone from this planet we call earth. In history we have the souls that went through some really hard times, such as Telsa, Van Gough etc..., yet these people are remembered for some of the greatest works. I am sure when they were alive they were just like the rest of us, living ordinary lives. Trying to change themselves to make the world a better place, but feeling so small in the greater space of life. Yet, many years after their deaths, see how they have made the world a better place. That was part of the story, in their storybook of life. The story moves on. I know it is a strange concept and thought to have, but it is part of change and letting go after all.
I rather live in a world where I am happy in the moment, instead of being miserable. I rather live in a world where I am ok with myself and not worried about pleasing others. I rather live in a world, where I control my own pain and let go of it. Where foregiveness is for myself, because I deserve the peace.
What are you going to CHANGE today? The choice is all yours.
I thought I would share a deep meditation technique that any one can do. This technique utilizes suggestive programming in order for you to enter deep meditation and can be very effective.
List of things you will need:
Place a burning candle a few inches away from you. Be sure the flame is at eye level. As the candle is very close to you, you will be able to surround it with your arms, clasping your hands behind the candle (be careful not to burn yourself- if you can not clasp the candle just "hold" the candle).
Begin concentrating intently on the candle flame. While doing so, breathe a little heavier and deep than normal. As you do this, feel yourself relaxing. At this point you will begin to practice the main technique of this candle meditation. You will coordinate specific thoughts (stated below) that are spoken out loud, synchronized with the opening and closing of your eyes. Every time you open your eyes, direct them to the flame. Repeat the steps, until you let go into a deep meditation. Indicators that the technique has taken a hold; slurring of your spoken words, difficulty in coordinating the words you are speaking with opening and closing of your eyes.
The coordinated steps, to say outloud. For best results, pause as possible between the opening and closing of your eyes and the corresponding spoken words.
Note: As soon as the indicators for letting go begin and/or when you feel it is best to go into the deep meditaiton, close your eyes and place your inner visual attention on your 3rd eye. Allow yourself to receive. Meditate as long as time allows.
Yes, in continual of The Science of Happiness from my course I took at edx.org I bring you another excerise of self loving to do! It does not take long and you may find yourself in awe! Love and Light everyone! Enjoy
This exercise asks you to write a letter to yourself expressing compassion for an aspect of yourself that you don’t like. Research suggests that people who respond with compassion to their own flaws and setbacks—rather than beating themselves up over them—experience greater physical and mental health.
First, identify something about yourself that makes you feel ashamed, insecure, or not good enough. It could be something related to your personality, behavior, abilities, relationships, or any other part of your life.
Once you identify something, write it down and describe how it makes you feel. Sad? Embarrassed? Angry? Try to be as honest as possible, keeping in mind that no one but you will see what you write.
The next step is to write a letter to yourself expressing compassion, understanding, and acceptance for the part of yourself that you dislike.
As you write, follow these guidelines:
1. Imagine that there is someone who loves and accepts you unconditionally for who you are. What would that person say to you about this part of yourself?
2. Remind yourself that everyone has things about themselves that they don’t like, and that no one is without flaws. Think about how many other people in the world are struggling with the same thing that you’re struggling with.
3. Consider the ways in which events that have happened in your life, the family environment you grew up in, or even your genes may have contributed to this negative aspect of yourself.
4. In a compassionate way, ask yourself whether there are things that you could do to improve or better cope with this negative aspect. Focus on how constructive changes could make you feel happier, healthier, or more fulfilled, and avoid judging yourself.
5. After writing the letter, put it down for a little while. Then come back to it later and read it again. It may be especially helpful to read it whenever you’re feeling bad about this aspect of yourself, as a reminder to be more self-compassionate.
Evidence that it works
Breines, J. G. & Chen, S. (2012). Self-compassion increases self-improvement motivation. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 18(9), 1133-1143.
Participants in an online study who wrote a compassionate paragraph to themselves regarding a personal weakness subsequently reported greater feelings of self-compassion. They also experienced other psychological benefits, such as greater motivation for self-improvement.
Other supporting evidence
Leary, M. R., Tate, E. B., Adams, C. E., Allen, A. B., & Hancock, J. (2007). Self-compassion and reactions to unpleasant self-relevant events: The implications of treating oneself kindly. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 92, 887-904.
Neff, K. D., & Germer, C. K. (2013). A pilot study and randomized controlled trial of the mindful self-compassion program. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 69(1), 28-44.
Shapira, L. B., & Mongrain, M. (2010). The benefits of self-compassion and optimism exercises for individuals vulnerable to depression. The Journal of Positive Psychology, 5, 377-389.
Why it works
Self-compassion reduces painful feelings of shame and self-criticism that can compromise mental health and well-being and stand in the way of personal growth. Writing is a powerful way to cope with negative feelings and change the way you think about a difficult situation.
Writing in a self-compassionate way can help you replace your self-critical voice with a more compassionate one--one that comforts and reassures you rather than berating yourself for your shortcomings. It takes time and practice, but the more your write in this way, the more familiar and natural the compassionate voice will feel, and the easier it will be to remember to treat yourself kindly when you’re feeling down on yourself.
Juliana Breines, Ph.D., Brandeis University
Kristin Neff, Ph.D., University of Texas, Austin
confessions of a starseed
Wisdom to be passed to the human race...